At dinner the other night, Chad made the wild boast that I have a magic ability. Not something cool like turning back time, or reading minds, or casting glamours that make everyone mistake me for Cate Blanchett, or even something as banal as turning water into wine or apples into gold. No, nothing exciting as that.
Think mundane: the sort of magic you wouldn’t notice unless you happened to have a never-ending trunk full of hats at your disposal (which, btw, it appears Sean does indeed have) and if you began by placing a fez on my head.
As far as I can tell, it is all the fez’s fault.*
“That looks kind of cute on you,” someone said.**
I laughed, and tried to catch a glimpse of my reflection in the window. Thus distracted, I wasn’t prepared for the boast:
“Yeah, Lisa can wear any hat and it looks good,” says Chad.
“Not really,” I said, reaching for more wine.
“Really,” Chad insisted. “It’s like magic. She’s got a head made for hats.”
(Tuck that info away for later, folks. My magical ability to wear a range of potentially ugly hats is bound to come in handy during the apocalypse. Forget lining up behind mages who can generate fireballs in their fingertips, or who can demolish zombies with a wink and a smile — I have the power of a high forehead that looks good covered up! Take that, mages!)
Anyhow, out paraded a succession of hats, from Devo’s red plastic jello-mold to the infamous “ugly straw hat”, all of which were summarily plunked on my noggin, then passed around until everyone present was sporting a jaunty cap.
The magic ability to wear hats garnered much discussion,*** and it made me wonder why I don’t wear hats more frequently, which led me to wonder why women nowadays don’t tend to wear hats (not including fascinaters at the races. But, to be perfectly honest, I don’t consider a single feather creatively glued to a hair clip a hat per se, so they don’t count.) Which made me realise something very important.
In order to wear a hat, one must have the appropriate outfit to carry it. And, as far as I’m concerned, “fashion” in the year 2010 leaves much to be desired. (I mean, honestly: 1980s revival? It was ugly in the 80s, people. It’s even uglier now.) Simply put, fashion these days is largely not hat-worthy.
So I went on a quest for hats I would want to wear, and realised (thanks to what has got to be my new favourite blog, http://www.oldfashionedpretty.com/) that when it comes to gorgeous headgear, elegant clothes are a must.
More recently, this.
Oh, and this too.
What’s that? Oh, right. This.
And though this woman isn’t wearing a hat, her outfit really warrants one.
*It possibly had something to do with the amount of red wine consumed. Just possibly.
**Not sure who said it. See the above asterisk.
***Sean also suggested I run a hat-themed promotion for the publicity of my first novel. I may indeed take his advice on this.